This Is A Long One!

Yesterday, I surprised Donny by taking him to Poughkeepsie to see Toy Story in 3-D. I told him we were going to the mall to exchange some pants and then I had a surprise adventure for him. On the way, we past a nursery filled with pumpkins. He suggested we make Big Daddy a pumpkin cake and he had a great recipe for the cake, but we had to stop at Hannaford's (grocery store) to get all of the ingredients. I reminded him about the surprise and told him we would make Big Daddy a cake another day.

When we arrived at the mall, he asked if they had a Hannaford's. For the record, he asked about Hannaford's about thirty times before we got to the movies. We did our shopping, put the things in the car and headed to the movies. When we entered the theatre, we were the only people, other than the employees. I felt bad because the popcorn contained milk so I wanted to get him something from the candy counter since this was his first time to the movies. While I was purchasing our snack, Donny had spotted a video game and wanted to "check it out." With one eye on him, I ordered a package of Twizzlers and a medium lemonade. The girl pulled up a cup that looked like a bucket and yes that was a medium. How about a small? I was given the sales pitch of the 50 cent difference and for some reason said okay to the bucket of lemonade.
I grabbed Donny and started to explain where we were and what we were doing on our long walk down the hall, around the corner and down the ramp to the man taking tickets.

I thought we should probably hit the bathroom while we were there, so in we went. I escorted Donny into the handicapped stall, locked the door and hung up my purse. I had repeated, "Don't touch ANYTHING!" as soon as we entered the bathroom until I locked the door. What is the first thing the boy does? With both hands, he walks right up to the toilet and lifts the seat. Most of you know how I feel about germs, so you know that I almost had an anxiety attack at that moment. I had to find a place to put my bucket of lemonade quickly before he touched anything else, so I rested the bucket on the end of the handle along the wall. I took care of him, turned him around and told him to stand still, Mama had to tinkle. I was just about finished, my pants still around my ankles, when he opened the door. I went to grab him and my movement knocked over the bucket of lemonade which coated the back of my legs and fanny. I tried to use toilet paper to blot the lemonade, but since it was 75% sugar I basically just decoupaged the back of my legs with the toilet paper. I wasn't worried that Donny was now facing me, because he was looking down at his shoes, "Mama! You just cleaned these shoes! Look at my shoes! They're all wet." Meanwhile, I'm covered in toilet paper!

We go out and I tell the ticket attendant about the spill. He directs us back to the candy counter for a free replacement and for some reason I actually go. When I get there, I tell the man (rotation of staff) just give me a small please. He says okay and then speaks into his headset to the woman ten yards away and tells her he needs to do a refund. I tell him don't worry about it, just give me the small and I'll be on my way. The woman shouts over, "Did you need to do a refund?" I turn around and tell her no and we're off again.

The ticket man tells us the location of our movie. I feel a bit like Karen Hill in Goodfellas when Jimmy tells her he has some dresses for her to pick out down the alley. We are still the only customers. We finally arrive. Donny picks out where he wants to sit. I pick him up, put him in the seat and his fanny goes into the crack, the seat flies up and he kicks himself in the face. I put him on my lap as the movie starts. I put my glasses on and give Donny his pair. He puts them on his face and they fall off, so for the rest of the movie the glasses stay in my purse and he watches a blurry movie. Twenty minutes in, he wants to know when we're going home.

When we get to the car, Donny asked me why we came here to watch Toy Story when we could watch it at home. Half way home he announces the following......"Mama, I want my own house........What if I don't have a son?!.........Does God make new people everyday?...........I decided I want a new family, I want to live with Mr. T and Miss D.......I still love you and don't worry, I will visit you in my car seat.

Donny's Pumpkin Cake Recipe

• Flour
• Honey Juice
• 15 Chocolate Chips
• Baking Powder